John Walkup
Emeritus, Electrical and Computer Engineering
Texas Tech University
[April 4, 2011] —
How should I react when my well-planned academic career is threatened — or overturned?
As a doctoral student at Stanford, I had to appear before two panels of professors to defend my dissertation. After a 20-minute presentation on my major results, one of my examiners whom I did not know well verbally criticized me for “not bringing your results down to my (his) level.” He continued on along this basic track for five minutes.
I had prayed long and hard about staying calm during my orals. Still, I was surprised by such a sense of God’s peace because the panelist’s words of criticism did not emotionally cripple me. My dissertation adviser, always the diplomat, asked his colleague to “give John some constructive suggestions” in view of the fact that I had to appear before a second panel of professors at the end of the hour.
God’s presence
Fortunately, the second panel was very friendly and by God’s grace I passed the exam. Even the hostile examiner voted to pass me. I have never forgotten how keenly I felt God’s presence that day. I am convinced that when we pray fervently for God’s peace, He delivers —though not always by exempting us from life’s harshest times.
I have watched students over the years ask for exemptions, most far from sapient. Yet I am not so sure I am all that different. If I am obedient, won’t God exempt me from some of life’s tougher tests? Don’t I deserve it?
I may not say it that crassly, but sadly, I can still subscribe to that misguided thinking. His ways are not my ways. God does not offer exemptions; He offers His presence.
Their Strong Dependence
As I write this today, I have friends who are:
- dealing with various forms of cancer;
- curtailing their schedules to take care of terminally ill spouses;
- facing salary cuts or layoffs due to state budget cuts;
- working in a poisonous atmosphere because of colleagues hostile to their faith;
- shipping their kids off to Iraq and Afghanistan and praying they will safely return home.
These friends have all testified to me of their strong dependence upon God’s grace, mercy and peace while they daily deal with challenges that dwarf the example I shared from my graduate student days.
I am convinced that if the desire of our hearts not only is to let Christ into our lives, but to give Him control of our lives, we will experience the peace that passes understanding (Philippians 4:7). Even when life is very, very harsh.
My prayer for myself, and for you, is that such dependence upon God’s peace and protection will truly become a “default state” in the future.
(c) 2011 John Walkup
(c) flickr user SP8254/Patrick Dirden Creative Commons license