Heather Holleman,
English,
Penn State University
[Sept 25, 2011]–
During the summer of 1994 when I was a camp counselor, a friend told me she thought I had the spiritual gift of encouragement. She posted a little note by my bed. It said, “You are an encourager.”
I remember exactly what it looked like–the handwriting, the color–and how it felt to have someone name something like that about me. My friend saw what I couldn’t see.
That single comment shaped the future of my life.
To Point Others
I wasn’t just an average girl; I was a hope giver, a courage finder, and an inspiration provider. I wasn’t just a nobody. God wanted to use me to point others towards a beautiful future. It took someone naming it to help me see it.
I had a student who told me that of all my weeks and weeks of teaching, the most memorable thing from my class was a single comment I wrote on one of his many essays.In the margin of his paper, I wrote: “You sound like a great teacher right here.” He was overwhelmed that I named that in him, and he later wrote about his dreams for graduate school to become a teacher.
As my husband and I discussed these comments, he told me he remembered the exact words of a Boy Scout leader who pointed out some unique gifts he saw in my husband. Those were turning point words.
Today as I guide students through their memoir drafts, I realize that I’m not naming what I see enough. I wonder what I need to name in my children, in my friends, and in my students. I see this in you. Maybe God will use it to shape a life. Maybe those words will be a turning point for someone today.
A Celebration of Doing Well
As a Christian professor, speaking words of encouragement goes against the grain. Pointing out a positive trait or complimenting a student seems unusual. I’ve been told that students normally encounter cynicism, discouragement, and criticism rather than optimism, encouragement, and a celebration of what they’re doing well.
When I go back to my own training as a teacher and scholar, I remember how much time we spent learning how to find out what was wrong with a scholarly article or a piece of student writing. Rarely (if at all) did we ask the question, “What did this writer do well?”
It became easy—second nature—to deconstruct, rip apart, and expose weakness. The more we could complain, the smarter we sounded.
What if I decided to take another path? What if I used my words to heal and inspire? What would it look like to cast a great vision within a student that could start from a single comment?
They Remember
I’ve seen the devastating effects of a negative turning point comment. I often ask students, for example, why they feel so afraid and insecure about their own writing. They can remember a specific moment when a teacher told them they were incompetent. They know when and where the insecurity and fear rose up in them.
I want them to know, instead, the exact moment when hope, confidence, and purpose took root inside of them. I want them to remember my class as a turning point.
(c) 2011 Heather Holleman (c) istockphoto
Heather Holleman has well described(sadly) my experience in the academic environment. I also try to compliment and acknowledge what is done well rather than try to find fault and criticize.
Heather, you have reminded me of what incredible power there is in our tongues — to hurt or to heal, to bring discouragement or to bring hope,to grunt complaints or sing thanks.
Thanks for the “Be An Encourager” message!
Mike Yoder, UGA, Athens, GA
Heather, you reflect God’s love so beautifully. I hope that more people are encouraged to live this out. I truly believe that we are given an enormous number of opportunities to be an encourager in the academic profession.
I also wanted to share a thought that helped me after a retreat with Anthony D’Mello. We would check a second time if we were given directions by an unkempt stranger. If we got criticism from the same person, we take it to heart. That is that we must not take every negative statement to heart or even try to process it. Just take it to God and let Him tell you what needs fixing or direction changing in our lives.
What a great reminder! Thank you for sharing this. It’s easy to fall into the trap of asking “how many points should I take off for this mistake?” instead of “how can I use this as an opportunity to build up this person and share the love of Christ?”
This was very timely for me – I’m am just about to embark on one of my least favorite tasks of the semester – scoring required memos in an Introduction to Engineering course with over 100 students. You have given me a renewed sense of purpose in this endeavor.
Yikes. Looks like I need some serious help from an English teacher regarding my comment writing!
Heather, thanks for your Encourager message. It is a good message for all who are in the classroom, but we can apply the same in all our relationships with others, whether they are our students or not. I think that is what Jesus wants us to do.
Heather, in a word, “Wonderful!”. Your piece on positive thinking and encouragment(vis-a-vis neg. thinking, discouragement) reminds me of my brother-in-law(human resource v.p. of a large corporation) patiently listening to a personnel report emphasizing the shortcomings of an employee–he finally interrupted, saying, “Fine, you’ve told me what the man CAN’T do–now tell me what he CAN DO!!.” I guess that’s where a “CAN DO” attitude gets its start. Jim Burns, engineering, Univ. of Florda(retired)
Thank you, Heather. We all need and love to receive encouraging comments, especially on our academic work. Faculty and students and ALL human beings respond well to praise and can be devastated by harsh criticism. Thanks for this reminder.
You are an encourager, Heather! Thank you!